Last October, I began to feel like the universe was out to get me. One thing after another went wrong. It seemed like every day, it was something new. At first, I let it get to me. I whined and felt sorry for myself. I even thought about doing a "Peeve of the day" instead of a regular Facebook status, because there were so many things that were ticking me off. After a day or two of thinking about that, I decided a different approach was in order. So what if a lot of things weren't going right? That's life. So what if things aren't perfect? There are so many people who have it worse.
Instead of the "Peeve of the day" I started November by posting each day something I was thankful for. Instead of dwelling on what was wrong, I took a deep breath, reminded myself that everything works out according to God's plan, and focused on being thankful for what I had. I looked back at times in my life that seemed bad when I was experiencing them, and how they ultimately led to the good things in my life. I was laid off when I was six months pregnant with Anna. I was devastated- I'd never been fired before, and even though being laid off isn't quite the same, it felt just as bad. Plus, being that far along in a pregnancy, my job prospects were nonexistent. As a result of the loss of income, we moved to Alabama. I hated it. I didn't know anyone and I was depressed and miserable. Then I found my church, renewed my faith and learned to stop griping about what I wanted and follow God's lead. I went back to school and earned an Associate's degree, then got accepted to Auburn, where I'll be earning a B.A. in Technical Writing this spring. See? Everything works out.
Anyway, back to this fall. I kept reminding myself that everything works out and resolved not to indulge in self-pity or even post a word about anything that was going wrong on Facebook. I only shared details with one friend and my sister, and a lot of things I just kept to myself. I chose to have faith in God to make things better, even though I couldn't see how He would do it.
Then came what could have been the last straw for my patience- Bill's car, that we had been sharing since mine died in October, broke down. It just stalled and wouldn't start again. We didn't have the money to buy parts for it (that might not have fixed the problem, since he wasn't completely sure what was wrong), and we didn't have money for a down payment on another car. I didn't know what to do, but it didn't even stress me out. I just knew God had a plan and it was going to be OK. The next day, Bill rode his motorcycle to work, the girls got rides to school with friends, and I walked to class. That afternoon, Bill texted me to say that he wanted to check with the Hyundai dealership, because one of his coworkers was able to get financing with them even though she had no down payment, no trade in, and she was going through a bankruptcy. So that evening when he got home, we went up to the dealership. We were upfront about our situation and they didn't laugh us off the lot, so we were optimistic. We test drove a couple of vehicles and really liked the Elantra. We went inside to discuss the financing. When the salesman went to run our credit application, Bill was a nervous wreck, but I was strangely calm. I knew that we would get approved- maybe not for the Elantra, but for something. I felt it. The salesman came back after an incredibly short amount of time- with an approval! Not only that, but the first payment fell EXACTLY on the first day that we would be able to afford it- January 15. Had Bill's car broken down a week earlier, we wouldn't have been able to buy a car because the payment would have been due before we had the money to pay it. I get paid once a month for my tutoring job, on the 15th, for the previous month. In December I started working with a second student, increasing my income enough to cover most of the car payment. January is the first month we could handle the extra expense. We knew it would still be tight, but I had faith that God would help us manage (and I was right, but I'll get to that in a minute).
Not only did everything work out perfectly for us to get the Elantra, it worked out for us to get a second car at the beginning of this month. Bill had decided to look for a Jeep Cherokee, and was getting frustrated because every time he found one he was interested in, it sold before we had the money to make an offer. I told him to stop stressing about it and reminded him that everything works out. I said that when it was time, the right car would be there. Sure enough, the day we had the money in the bank to do it, he found a listing he hadn't seen before- a Grand Cherokee Orvis, with an asking price within our price range. He went to look at it and the owner even dropped the price, making it a very nice deal (he checked the book value later, he got a GREAT deal). So now we both have good, reliable vehicles- one paid in full- and we don't have the constant stress of worrying about what's going to break next (between August and October, we had to use our roadside assistance to have a vehicle towed three times).
And here's the most awesome example of all of how God makes everything work for the best:
Last June, I experienced my first aura migraine. If you don't know what that is, let me just say that it WASN'T COOL! I was on the interstate with kids in the car when suddenly I saw this shimmery rainbow/prism-y arc of color at the edge of my peripheral vision. A few minutes later, I felt like someone had kicked me in the head. BAM! That fast. It was awful. (I've had cluster migraines my whole life, but they come on slowly, getting worse then easing up, then getting worse again until they peak, and even though they can last for days, at least there's enough warning to take something for the pain to keep it manageable.) Since then, the auras have been coming more and more frequently. In November, I went to the doctor to see what could be done and was prescribed Imitrex. It didn't really help, and at the beginning of December I went back because I'd had a migraine every week, three weeks in a row. They increased my dosage of Imitrex, added another non-narcotic pain reliever, and started me on a medication that would help prevent migraines. I took the preventive and the milder pain reliever for about a week, and at that point I no longer had a headache at all. Since then, I've just been taking the preventive and it's working beautifully. Today I went back for a follow-up to let the doctor know we've found the right combination of meds and get refills to last me for a while. While we were talking, she asked about my major and whether I worked in addition to my classes, to evaluate my stress level to see if that might be a trigger for the headaches. When I told her I'm an English major and that I tutor, she became very interested. She told me she has a daughter in the fifth grade who needs a writing tutor! And it turns out, her daughter goes to the same school as Molly and Anna and is friends with Molly! I gave her my number and she called me this evening. I'll be tutoring her daughter, as well as picking her up from school some days. This is an ideal situation for both of us- it alleviates the stress she was dealing with on days she had to work late, on top of worrying about her daughter's writing grades, and give me enough extra income that I won't have to play "juggle the budget" every month.
See? Have faith and everything will work out. And honestly, could we truly appreciate our blessings if we didn't have to go through dark times now and then?
